Dic(k)tator
Noun\ ˈdik-ˌtā-tər
Definition of dic(k)tator
Pint-sized version of equal-parts fascist and communist tyrant, requiring inhumane amounts of energy and self-control. Controls all aspects of your life, including but not limited to: sleep; feeding; clothing and apparel choices; bowel movement disposal options (eg.: feces as wall graffiti media); radical reinterpretation of common household items (eg.: a couch becomes a trampoline for death-defying acrobatics); challenges traditionally-held concepts of time. May display sociopathic traits but is not defined by them. Incapable of remaining silent, particularly in the latter part of the day.
See also: Toddler.
Synonyms of dic(k)tator:
oppressor, cockblocker, asshole, shitstain, depriver of sleep, ingrate, cabròn, dic(k), robber of neurons, stronzetto, bringer of pain, joy-abductor.
Examples of dic(k)tator in a sentence.
“My son is such a dic(k)tator: last night he refused to sleep in his own bed and wouldn’t stop screaming until we let him into our bed”.
“I spent two hours cleaning my kid’s room after she decided to paint the walls with her own shit. Classic dic(k)tator move”.
